<p>Dear Ms. Bellamy,</p><p>I’m sorry if this is an intrusion, but I was hoping you could help me with my boyfriend, Jacob. I love him. He’s truly a wonderful man. He’s kind, caring, smart, successful, handsome, and much more. He’s all the things a girl is supposed to want in a guy.</p><p>It’s just that our sex life isn’t really what I want it to be. I feel this incredible urge to dominate him, I just don’t know how to broach the subject. He’s never really seemed like a guy that would be into that sort of thing and I’m afraid that if I come right out and tell him that I’m dominant and I want him to be submissive that he might just break up with me.</p><p>I’ve also never really dominated a guy before. I’ve thought about it and fantasized about it (a lot), but I don’t have any experience with it. So, what do I do? Any help would be appreciated.</p><p>Sarah</p><p>~~~~~</p><p>Dear Sarah,</p><p>Thank you for getting in touch. I’d be happy to help. I can’t promise you that my advice will work, but I’m more than happy to offer it and to keep in touch as you discover your dominant side with Jacob.</p><p>I tend to lean towards showing rather than saying. What I mean is that I think you should simply try dominating Jacob to see how he responds. If he seems to find it an utterly abhorrent notion you might have to look for another man (as sad as that might seem). If he seems to find the experience arousing, then you have something of a green light to keep playing.</p><p>I’ll give you the basics of something you can try. I’d do it on a day when you’re going to be together all day. Let’s say you make it this Saturday. You want to start by teasing him bright and early. Maybe wake him up with a little kissing or play between his legs. Stroke him, get him hard, get him excited, and then end it. Don’t have sex with him. Don’t get him off. Get him all worked up and then deny him (without saying that’s what you’re doing, of course).</p><p>The goal is to repeat that process throughout the day. Make sure you’re together and make sure you keep him aroused. You know your boyfriend best, but it shouldn’t take much more than a few well-placed kisses, maybe a little bit of groping, etc. You don’t want him to be a walking boner all day long, but you do want him aroused and thinking about you.</p><p>Then, as the day is nearing its end, you pay off all that arousal. You change into something you know Jacob likes and you tell him to get naked and get into the bed. You make him think that you’re going to blow his mind with the hottest sex of his life. He’ll be so aroused he’ll do anything you tell him to.</p><p>Chances are good that he’ll try and do whatever you usually do. Maybe he’ll try and toss you onto your back and fuck you missionary style. Maybe he’ll try and get you to give him head and then ride him until he cums inside you. The key is to deny him whatever you usually do. Throw him off his game. If he reaches up to play with your breasts, grab him by the wrist and gently move his hand away. Tell him he doesn’t get to play with your breasts until you say he can. Make your voice soft and sexy. Make it like you’re playing a naughty little game, not like you’re punishing him for something.</p><p>It’s important to decide what you want to do beforehand, at least to a certain degree, because it’s your first time dominating him. So, how do you want him to make you cum? Do you want to sit on his face? Do you want to ride his cock? Do you want him to finger you? Make that decision and then make him cum before he even gets close to losing his orgasm.</p><p>I think your best bet is to make him cum with a handjob. That allows you total control and it lets you talk dirty to him in a super sensual way. You can whisper, kiss him, kiss his neck, etc. Then you can make him cum and he will end up feeling like you’ve been in control the entire time. With any luck, he’ll have a great orgasm that he’ll associate with your control and that dominance you showed off. Once a man has a great orgasm, he wants more, and that’s how you get started down the road to domination.</p><p>Let me know how it goes. I always love to hear if my advice is at all helpful.</p><p>Becca</p><p>P.S. – You can call me Becca :)</p><p>~~~~~</p><p>Dear Becca,</p><p>Let me get this out of the way: Your advice worked like a charm. It was truly incredible. I had a better orgasm than I’ve had in months and I’m pretty sure Jacob came harder than he ever has.</p><p>If it’s okay, I’d really love to tell you about it. I don’t have anyone to talk about this stuff with and the whole thing is just so exciting.</p><p>So, I took your advice and did it on a Saturday. The planning started on Friday, though. I slept in this pink satin camisole and tap pants set that Jacob absolutely loves, and though I could tell he wanted to fuck me the moment I got into bed, I told him I was too tired for that. I promised I’d take care of him on Saturday, though.</p><p>I feel like that made him even more excited when he woke up to the feeling of my hand around his cock. He was already hard (morning wood is so reliable) and he immediately had this giddy look on his face.</p><p>“Good morning, sweetheart,” I said as I played with the head of his cock.</p><p>He groaned a little bit and that giddy smile returned. I know I wasn’t really dominating him, but I kind of felt like it because I knew there was no way I was letting him fuck me. I had already decided Jacob wasn’t getting what he wanted on Saturday morning, which kind of felt like domination. Either way, it was really sexy for me. I was actually turned on enough that I would have loved to have him inside me, but I was determined to wait and see if your advice would play out.</p><p>I teased him for a good ten minutes before looking at the clock and saying, “Okay, we have to get ready for breakfast.”</p><p>That was the first moment when I thought there might be a problem. Jacob had this frustrated look on his face and for just a second I thought he might become one of those guys that yells about blue balls, cock teasing, etc.</p><p>“I always make you feel good, don’t I?” I asked him. “Maybe I just wanted to tease you a little this morning before making you feel good later?”</p><p>I didn’t give him a chance to react. Instead, I got out of bed, stripped, and got in the shower. Jacob actually tried to join me – I’m pretty sure he figured he could convince me to have shower sex – but I turned him down. He still had a boner when he walked away, though, so I don’t think he was too upset.</p><p>After I showered and got dressed I gave Jacob a long, slow kiss in the kitchen and his boner returned.</p><p>“What’s gotten into you today?” he asked.</p><p>“I don’t know,” I said. “Is it a problem?”</p><p>I reached out and played with his dick a little and he shook his head. “Not at all.”</p><p>I felt more confident right from the start of the day. It seemed to emanate from the fact that I’d decided to dominate him. That was it. I’d decided I was going to be a dominant girl and it filled me with confidence. It was amazing.</p><p>We went out for breakfast, which didn’t leave much room for teasing, though I did manage to play footsie under the table a little and I did pull him close for a long, coffee-flavored kiss after we left the restaurant.</p><p>I might have gone a little overboard, because the truth is that Jacob kind of was a walking boner on Saturday. That didn’t upset me, of course. I liked it. I think he liked it too. He was certainly a little frustrated that I kept getting him hard without even taking his dick out, but I feel like he was actually pretty excited about all of it.</p><p>The movie was the most fun. We went to a 5:30 showing and I picked seats in the back row. I don’t think I let five minutes go by without kissing Jacob or reaching over to play with his cock in his pants.</p><p>I almost jerked him off in the theater, to be honest. I was having so much fun playing with him that I kind of wanted to just go for it. I kept myself in check, though.</p><p>Jacob tried his very best to fuck me in the movie theater parking garage. There was no one else around so I can see why he wanted to do it, but he was all over me. We were kissing and he put his hand in my pants and found how wet I was. I couldn’t entirely blame him for thinking I was down to get fucked. I’d just spent two hours teasing him.</p><p>“I need you to be good for me, Jacob. I need you to keep yourself in check just a little longer,” I said after a few minutes of vigorous foreplay in the garage. “I promise your patience will be rewarded.”</p><p>I registered something on his face when I said I needed him to “be good for me,” and I’m pretty sure it was arousal. I think he liked the idea. It was enough to get him in the car, certainly.</p><p>When we got home I pulled him to the bedroom, told him to get naked, and stepped into the closet to change into something sexy, as you recommended. Jacob is a fan of really feminine lingerie, so I put on a sheer pink baby doll that I absolutely love. It makes my breasts look spectacular, which I imagine is a big part of why Jacob loves it too.</p><p>His dick was rock hard and he had a gleeful look on his face when I stepped out of the closet and walked towards him. You were right about how he’d be, too.</p><p>He was halfway out of the bed by the time I walked over. He pulled me close and his hands were all over me. He was trying to direct the action. He was trying to fuck me.</p><p>“No, no,” I said as I pulled his hands from my ass. “I asked you to lay in the bed.”</p><p>He looked up at me with genuine confusion in his eyes, but it washed away and was quickly replaced by a smile. He moved to his back and watched as I straddled him.</p><p>“Teasing you turns me on,” I said as I reached out and ran my fingers through the precum at the tip of his cock. “I don’t know why, but it does. I had so much fun today. You felt how wet I was. You felt how excited I got playing with you all day.”</p><p>“It turns me on too,” he said. “Though I guess that’s obvious.”</p><p>I moved a little closer and rubbed my panty-clad pussy over Jacob’s cock. I knew he could feel the heat emanating from me and the wetness that soaked my panties.</p><p>“Fuck,” Jacob said as he reached down and tried to pull my panties aside.</p><p>“No,” I said as I gently grasped his wrist.</p><p>I grabbed his other wrist and pushed them above his head. Jacob didn’t offer any resistance. We kissed and I sucked on his tongue as he moved his hips upwards in a futile attempt to penetrate me.</p><p>I sat on his chest and pulled my panties aside, showing him my pussy. I saw him stare. He licked his lips.</p><p>I rubbed my pussy and pushed two fingers inside as Jacob watched. I’d seen it in a domination video that I found enormously arousing. I did the same thing the girl had done. I offered Jacob my fingers. It was so fucking hot when he opened his mouth and sucked on them. Our eyes met as he was doing it. I think that was the moment when I was completely confident Jacob was going to let me do what I wanted that night.</p><p>I repeated the fun with my fingers a few more times before making my final move. I crawled forward a little and sat on Jacob’s face.</p><p>“Make me cum,” I said.</p><p>His tongue went to work immediately. It felt so fucking good, too, and it was more than just his skill at eating pussy or the fact that I’d been turned on for much of the day. It was the fact that I was sitting on his face. It was the fact that I was dominating him for the first time. It was the fact that he seemed so eager to play the part.</p><p>I came in less than a minute. It was a mind-bending orgasm, too. I actually saw stars and for just a split second the whole world went white. How incredible.</p><p>I sat on Jacob’s chest for a little as I recovered from the orgasm. He seemed a little dazed, too. It turns out it was his first time eating pussy in that way.</p><p>I rolled off of him and he immediately tried to get on top to fuck me missionary style. I placed a hand on his chest and said, “No,” once more and he rolled onto his back.</p><p>I wrapped my fingers around his cock and stroked him slowly. “Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m going to make you feel good. I promise.”</p><p>I had him right away. He closed his eyes and moaned. Precum dripped from his cock.</p><p>“I loved the way you ate my pussy,” I said. “I loved riding your tongue while you gave me exactly what I needed. I even love seeing some of my juices on your face right now.”</p><p>I kissed his neck and licked a little bit of my juice from his skin. He moaned a little bit louder.</p><p>“I loved it too,” he said.</p><p>“That’s good,” I replied. “That’s so good, baby, because I think we’re going to do it a lot more often.”</p><p>I took his groan to mean that he liked the idea and I certainly did.</p><p>What I loved about stroking his cock was that I got turned on again, like almost immediately. I felt completely in control. He was on his back, his eyes were closed, I had his cock in my hand, and he was sort of whimpering a little, like an entire day of being aroused had reduced him to a regressed mental state.</p><p>To be honest, it was kind of incredible. I could have cum again if I’d reached between my legs and masturbated. I wanted to make Jacob cum, though.</p><p>“You were so good for me today,” I said. “I had so much fun playing with you and you made me cum so hard, Jacob. You made me cum so hard.”</p><p>He moaned.</p><p>“Do you want to cum, baby? Do you want me to make you cum?” I asked.</p><p>“Yes, please, make me cum,” he said.</p><p>I smiled and stroked him faster. I kissed his neck. I twisted my hand right at the top of the stroke, just like he loves.</p><p>He groaned and his pelvis shot into the air as a huge rope of cum launched from the tip of his cock. It landed on his stomach as I kept stroking him. His body convulsed as the pleasure ripped through him. It was truly incredible.</p><p>“That was unbelievable,” Jacob said after. “Thank you. Fuck, thank you so much.”</p><p>The gratitude made me smile. That seemed like a good sign.</p><p>So, all told, I’d say it was a big success. I do have a question, though. On Sunday morning Jacob was all over me and I ended up caving and we had vanilla sex. Missionary. It was really nice and I came, but it wasn’t a particularly good orgasm and it was nothing like the night before.</p><p>Am I terrible for not really wanting to have vanilla sex with him anymore? Would it be a mistake to try and make everything about domination play from now on?</p><p>Thanks for your help!</p>